Mar. 28th, 2011 @ 04:17 pm
Relationship Satisfaction of Partners of Female to Male Trans Men
How do I qualify?
Are you 18 or older? Are you a partner of a female-to-male trans man or a female to male trans man who is partnered? Have you been in this romantic relationship before he transitioned (however you define transitioning) and are still in the relationship now?
In order to qualify for this study you (the non-FTM partner) must be at least 18 years old and have not or do not plan to make a gender transition. Your FTM partner must also be at least 18 years old. Research participation is restricted to those who are living in the United States, or international participants who can speak and read English and are willing and able to use Skype. We are especially attempting to recruit partners of color as well as cis-male partners of FTMs, but all cisgender partners are welcome to participate.
Who is doing this and why?
Rebecca Keo, a partner of Colt Meier, a trans man, and a person of color, is conducting a research study on the romantic relationships of trans men. She is an undergraduate student at the University of Houston studying Psychology and LGBT studies. The results from this study will be used for her Undergraduate Senior Honors Thesis. The purpose of this research is to help inform researchers about romantic relationships that persist through a gender transition of an FTM. This study examines the non-FTM partner’s unique experience as they witness their partner’s transition.
What do I have to do to be a part of the research?
The study consists of an online questionnaire, which should take approximately 1 to 1.5 hours for both partners to complete separately. The questionnaires will assess basic demographic information as well as relationship satisfaction, physical and psychological abuse, and alcohol dependence. Upon completion of the questionnaire, the non-FTM partner will be asked to participate in an interview regarding your romantic relationship and experience through his transition. The interview will also last approximately 1-1.5 hours.
Both partners must read and agree to the consent form before filling out the survey and participating in the interview. This study has been reviewed by the Committee for Protecting Human Subjects at the University of Houston.
How do I get started?
If you would like to get more information or to participate in this research study, please email Rebecca at firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject line: Partner of FTM Research. From there, she will ask you a few questions to make sure that you qualify, and then send you the consent form to look over. If you would still like to participate after reading and signing the consent form, she will send you a link to the online surveys, one for each partner. After you both fill out the surveys, then Rebecca will work with you to set up an interview time for the partner of the FTM (via phone or Skype).
x posted everywhere on LJ, FB, and listservs
hey also guys.. made a fb group for us to all keep in contact. since i know a lot of us are also on fb and maybe get on that more frequently. i know for me, i get on there a lot more than here. yay!
|» (No Subject)|
we have for so long been told as a transgendered nation that we cannot be God's.. that God doesn't love us and so forth. This is furthest from the truth. i believe God's made us His special people. and i don't just believe this, i know this to be fact. |
Be encouraged today that you are NOT alone in this. I also encourage you to find out how God wants to transform you. Spend some time just asking Him "How do you want to transform me? I give it to you.. whatever you need to do, do it."
i hear the hearts of so many guys crying out for some answers. Trust me. I've been there. I didn't know not a single other trans guy that also believed in God like I did. And have faith in Jesus Christ as the Son of the living God. and then the Holy Spirit.. seriously... i felt so alone. I came out to people even at my church and they rejected me.
however.. i stayed faithful knowing that just because the people i was going to church with hadn't had the revelation that being trans is not "weird"... doesn't mean i'm going to let it stop me from pursuing God with everything in me.
There's a point you get to in your life when you realize... "this is bigger than me. i can't do this alone. there's got to be something more." whether you know God and you say that, or you're just surrounded by turmoil in your life... we all experience that. it's in us to feel that way. because God's created each of us with a huge hole in our heart that only He can fill.
i want to dispell the myths and the rumors that God's an angry guy who if you're not good will punish you. and you should be on your best behavior so that He doesn't kill you. whatever... the Kingdom of darkness would have you believe that. that's a lie! Satan's whole purpose is to kill, steal, and destroy. God doesn't give disease. He gives life that's eternal.. there is no death in the life He gives!!! why? because Jesus took that on for the entire human creation.. if we would just believe and confess "Jesus! You are Lord!"
okay, so with all of that out of the way... laying some ground work...
once you've reconciled being trans(gender) with God... (and then anything having to do with sexual orientation: gay or straight or queer). gender is different than our sexual orientation. I, personally, am a straight man. I am called by God to be trans. woohoo! however.... this means i am responsible for that call. which means.. i must be consecrated to His Kingdom and for His purposes. I want to house the Spirit of God in this temple with all holiness I possibly can. No, i'm not perfect, however... repentance is key. When I repent, God forgives me and sees me as clean.
You see, God calls us to be holy (set apart) because He is holy. He's called us out from the world. and this is how He marks us.
1 Peter 1:13-16(NIV)
13 Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. 14 As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. 15 But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; 16 for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy."
Exodus 22:31 NIV
"You are to be my holy people."
1). Repent. the word literally means to come higher. to change your mind... we use this as to change your mind TO God instead of what your flesh wants to do.
2). Read the Bible. Find out what God's talking about. Start simple. If this is your first time reading the Bible, I suggest you start in the Gospel of John. Also, you don't have to go out and buy a Bible if you don't have the money right now- there are websites galore that have all the translations you could ever want, but i recommend it! and also get a notebook to write down everything that stands out to you. you can start by taking post-it notes and write down one scripture a day and just meditate on it all day.
a good version to start with is the New International Version( NIV) or the New Living Translation (NLT).
3) Pray - this doesn't have to be difficult. if you're new to praying, just start simple. God is a person... even though you can't see Him. He is alive. So write Him a letter or talk to Him on a walk in the park. Ask questions. be honest. the more honest you are with Him the better. He LOVES honesty.
4) Find fellow believers. like on this community. just make sure they say Jesus Christ is the Lord and the only way to God and the Bible is the Word of God- seek resources that are only Bible based. there are a lot of places out there that preach a little of this, and a little of that. that's not God's way. beware. if you ever have any questions don't hesitate to message me or comment on here. I am here for you in this!
another thing that you can do is start listening to podcasts from affirming churches. like for instance there is one in Georgia, DC, florida, California... i mean.. in the next 5 years there will be multiple places you can go in your state.. but until then.. get on a podcast!!!
here are links for free online Bible resources. They have links for beginners AND devotionals that you can sign up with your email. There are some really good ones on crosswalk.com(about a bajillion)
http://www.youversion.com (also downloadable for blackberry phones and other phones)
Joel Osteen Podcast is really good and practical for everyday
Joyce Meyer is also really good and practical too
Bill Johnson is realllllly deep into the prophetic and supernatural moves of God. a WONDERFUL podcast. (my personal fave)
Savedandgay podcast is also really good. it's an affirming church in georgia.
they have a really good podcast on there called "saved and gay" it's about being gay and saved... lol it's really good. just add in trans too. because it covers all spectrums.
andy stanley at north point church in atlanta- not affirming.. but really good stuff
an affirming church-
that should be good to start with!!!
Remember Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God!!!! So get in the Word anyway you can!! :]
so, where does everybody live?
it's got to be a transformation and not just a transition. when you transition-- you move from one place to another, just changing the vehicle in which you arrive. in the middle of the word is the key-- you SIT. to be transformed.. means that you are changing the purpose of it. like our TRANSFORMED scripture in the Word of God... saying|
Romans 12:1-2 Living Sacrifices
1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God–this is your spiritual act of worship.
2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.
We as men of God, must take this to heart. all throughout the Word of God we see how God looks at things created and maintained by human hands. it's already got its glory. but what if... what if God wants to completely do your transformation. COMPLETELY. fully functional male without ever having to go to man to make you a man. would you do it? if not, why not?
Let me tell you brothers, I am trusting God that He's going to do the work. The trans community has definitely suffered from not feeling a part of the church, but also by some feeling like they are a mistake and feeling like you're a different gender is wrong. I'm here to tell you, YOU ARE NOT A MISTAKE.
Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind
1 As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth.
2 His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”
3 “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.
In the same way like this man who was born a certain way... i feel like this is a word for the transgender community saying, "Hold on, I've got a plan. You weren't born this way by mistake. I created and crafted you. I'm holding you in my hands! Just wait! I've got a better way!"
So how do you start? Well, first I would definitely say it starts with asking Jesus to be Lord of your life. Without Him, it would literally be impossible to start this journey, because He is the one who's leading you in it... and the Holy Spirit. Jesus is our example in the transgender community. we need to reach out to one another and pull in the ones who are feeling saddened that they are made a mistake, let them know they're not!
Jesus sticks closer than a brother... there's a sense of excitement when you let Jesus be head of your transformation... not transition.. but transformation. It starts with the renewing of your mind. He wants to make you a man from the inside out. And like a lot of things with God.. it starts in the shadows.. in the hidden places before it will come to the light. Ask Him to be head of your transformation and watch things begin to happen supernaturally.
Join this revolution, brother. It's headed up by the most radical man that ever walked this earth: Jesus.
please feel free to comment with prayer requests or things you need help with in where you are with transitioning/transforming. I'm here with you brothers!
|» Looking for redemtion.|
I am 19 year old Trans gender boy and I am barely beggining my journey I been raised born again christian by my perents and when I was around maybe 14 I came out to myself and many of my friends as transgendered when I did I pushed my faith into the back of my head because I couldn't see how it could be possible to be christian and trans gender and to top it all of gay. I spent years and years in sin and I am more then ashamed and I am now 19 and I went on a road trip with my best friend and she is sort of christian but she had thirdday on her ipod and she put it on and it touched me and ever since then I have been wanting to go back to that to having a real solid relationship with god that involves me living a lifestyle that jesus the lord would want me to live as a man as who i am. I don't know if anyone would be able to maybe just pray for me beacuse I find just a everyday struggle not to give in to temptation. I would really appreciate it because trying to find reedemtion is something i know i have to fight for. Learning to deal with who i am and learning that god loves me and accepts me and can touch me just as i am and i can live a holy life in his eyes. Is not something easy for me to accept so i ask for your prayers and extend a friendship that is more then needed. Because not a lot of my friends are christian and not a lot are transgendered or even gay. I am praying the lord gives me someone to help me look for him and live my life as a good christian. |
Thank you soo mush for taking the time to read this.
|» Join the Tribeca Protest Over "Ticked Off Trannies" Film|
A demonstration against the Tribeca Film Festival's choice to feature the movie "Ticked Off Trannies With Knives" will take place in NYC tonight. The movie promotes transphobia and makes light of the rape and violence all too often directed at transwomen. In addition to the offensive title of the movie, the film portrays transwomen as being performers.|
|» plugged in?|
Last nite I was reading a devotional and it had a daily Bible reading in it. I felt the Holy Spirit tell me, "say you'll read it." So I answered, "okay.. I'll read it." So I read through the devotional and came to the end of it.. I was extremely hesitant on reading my Bible. I kinda felt like I was trying to distance myself from God for some unknown reason. I was saying inside, "I just won't do it... hopefully no one will hold me accountable.." Then a scripture came to mind, "Let your yes mean YES! and your no mean NO!" Now, I love God and everything about Him but there was just something in me that was like.. "ugh.. i just can't be perfect for you right now, Dad." |
It was honest, un-cut, uncensored. Even I was a little taken aback at just how honest and real I was being. I kinda sat there for a while contemplating if I hurt God's feelings.
All I heard was, "Thank you."
I swallowed my lazy pride and just opened up to the chapter and began reading the verses and low and behold it was exactly what i needed to hear. I didn't stop there, I read 2 more chapters. I was blessed to overflowing by the scriptures I read. It was all about honesty and being real with God.
It's like God was relieved that I just opened up my heart to Him. It was a sigh of relief for me. I feel like that was a milestone in my relationship with Him. I have a friend whose walk with the Lord always impacts me. She said one time that she didn't speak to God for a whole week. God kept nudging her to open up. So finally on the way home from work one night she got fed up of holding it in and just spilled it.
"You know what? I'm mad at you..." she said
"I've been waiting all week for you to tell me that." God replied.
Sometimes God's waiting on us to be just open and real with Him. Newsflash... God already knows what you're going through and feeling, He just wants to be the one you come to. He wants you to share your life and experiences with Him. He's got everything, there's nothing you could give Him that He doesn't already have besides YOU.
Relationships are work. Sometimes it takes a lot to keep it going and it's not every time you get the same in return. When you do find someone who is willing to put forth the effort to keep you in their life, the relationship goes deeper. That's why there's "bromances", sisterships, soul-mates. God is the ultimate out of all of these.
He was fighting for you before you even took your first breath. Before you knew the letters in the alphabet He was already outlining your life and the blessings that would come and the wonderful future He has in store for you. God's always reminding me that His call is irrevocable. His promises are "YAY!" and Amen. Though your sorrow may last for the night, Joy comes with the morning. That although I may feel like I stick out like a sore thumb... I am NEVER NEVER EVER alone. Paul's words in 2 corinthians 4.17,
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory
Jesse Duplantis in His testimony about visiting Heaven he tells about a conversation he has with the Apostle Paul. He says Paul was very adamant about getting Jesse to tell us back here on earth that the light affliction we go through here, "which is but for a moment" is just that.. FOR A MOMENT.
This whole past week I've just kept hearing that God is opening up a new season of honesty in our lives. He wants to show us how honesty can deepen and expand our relationship with Him in our life. I feel that this is a challenge and an opportunity for growth with our Father. There's more to life and God's wanting to show you. Step out on faith.. start being honest with Him in the utmost reverence you will see for yourself.